Monday, March 11, 2013

in a "monday" state of mind

the more things change, the more they stay the same.  i want off this crazy train, make it stop.  it seems that just when my life has found "direction" and a semblance of stability with just a pinch of success added to the mix, something happens that causes my peace and stability to fall off kilter.  again. so like so many times before, i pick myself up, assess the damage, try to come up with a game plan, and start over.  again.
how long before i don't have to start over anymore?  how long before i find my happy ending? whatever it may be?  how long?  great.  now u2's "sunday bloody sunday" is playing in my head.  and yours too, probably.  -you're welcome.  ugh! i can't even rant correctly!  as i was whining saying, "hasta cuando?"  meaning in spanish, "until when?" or as i translated it, how much longer? the thing is, i'm getting scared.  of failing.  of not finding that "happy place" -ever.  what if this is as good as it gets for me?  sigh.  in a state of quandry, indeed.

mondays usually suck anyway, right?  i'm glad this day is just about over.

make it a great week, kids!


8 comments:

Alessandra said...

MOndays are not my favorites either, hopefully the rest of the week will be better, then we need to work on the rest of your life, cause you gotta get happy girlie, and I won't take no for an answer....:)

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear you're stuck in this endless cycle of despair. Hopefully things will start to turn around for you. Just stick to your plan, and seize those moments of happiness when they arrive.

And yes, I now have U2 stuck in my head. But I love that song, so it's ok :-)

Robin said...

I agree with Chris... you're just stuck right now. This, too, shall pass.

Unknown said...

I feel for you Yvonne, I've been there. Love usually comes when we're least looking for it, and I'm sure yours will come along soon. Enjoy this time by yourself, a time for introspection. Think about what it is that will make you happy, and pursue that with a vengeance.

Yvonne said...

Alessandra- Haha! Thanks chica! I'm working on it. I want to be happy too!!!

Chris- Thanks! I'll be alright. This will pass and then I can concentrate on getting happy, again. It's going to take me a little while, but I'll get there eventually. How are you? I hope things are looking up for you as well! :)

Robin- yes mam, it will! thanks for your encouragement.

Felicia- I'm working on it. And I believe things are going to change for the better, for me. In the meantime, I'm rediscovering myself. :) Thanks for your encouragement, I really appreciate it.

Don said...

Yvonne,

At times Mondays may be better than Fridays.

This past Monday may not have been so great for us, but this coming is Friday is a day to be fearful of........Friday, March 15.........The Ides of March.

"Beware The Ides of March".

'Yellow Rose' Jasmine said...

While I don't have an answer for you, I do have a suggestion. Maybe get your mind off life for awhile by taking a little trip away or volunteering somewhere new- even for just a day. Sometimes we just have to shake up the routine to see what comes of things.

Yvonne said...

Don- ha! indeed!

YRJ- Those are great suggestions! I've signed up to volunteer preparing Easter baskets for the homeless' children in our area. -Great minds think alike! :)

Chapter 56

The sunlight peeping through the curtains, stir her from her sleep.  Her eyes open and she rubs them a bit before sitting up in bed.  Eyes n...