Monday, April 30, 2012

sleeping may be hazardous to your dreams

I had a really good dream last night.  The kind of dream that, even after waking up, you try and go back to sleep, just so you can continue dreaming.  Of course, realizing hours later, that your dream was about  your BOSS, can be hilariously awkward. 

Yeah.  That would be this girl, me.  I have no idea why or what led me to have such a hot and sexy dream about him.  Upon talking to my friend about it ( oh come on, you didn't really think I  was going to keep this to myself did you?) she asked me if I secretly had a crush on him. Um, no.  Not in the least.  I think he's an attractive man, but that's as far as that goes.  I don't think I have ever "crushed" on a boss before.  Now, co-workers, vendors and opposing counsel, well that's a whole different story!  But bosses? Nah.  Too messy. What happens if the crush gets out of hand? Or worse, if the boss finds out about said crush?  No thank you!  So of course, I was baffled as to why I even had this type of dream about him in the first place.  Seeing him first thing this morning, at the office, made me blush and giggle.  And for the first half hour or so, I couldn't even look him in the eye. I felt embarrassed.  Yes, the dream was THAT hot.  But by midday, his neurotic, absent-minded, and holier than thou personality, dissipated any remnants of that dream.

What about you? Ever crush on a coworker? A boss? Did you act on it or just let it be? Share with me.  I'm nosy like that.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

What's in a name? And other quandries

Happy Wednesday everyone!  How has your week been so far? Mine has been kind of hectic and stressful.  You know, the usual.  So I totally just screwed up.  Today is actually Thursday! Bahahahaha! See? I am so frazzled that I didn't even know what day it was.  Meh.  I'll leave my mistake up there for your amusement.  Moving on.   It's officially almost the weekend! Yay! Well, it will be in less than an hour.  What bodes for you this weekend?

I don't have a lot planned, kind of quiet, actually.  I do have to go into the office for a few hours on Saturday but the overtime makes up for having to wake up early on my day off.  Which in turn, makes me happy.

In other news, I read an article last night that really, really, pissed me off!  It was about women over forty (cough) who have never been married and the likely causes for this travesty.  I'll give you the top five (there were 30 reasons given):

5.  Insecurities with herself
4.  Hates men
3.  Has unresolved "daddy" issues
2.  Is looking for "Mr. Perfect"
1.  Is past her prime, ie -has missed the boat (yes it actually said that)

Why is it that a single woman, over a certain age,  is deemed "damaged goods" or "over the hill"?   But a man over a certain age, who is still single, is considered, "a great catch!"?  Hmm, a little biased much?  Alright, so I clearly have a problem with this! Why is it always the "woman" who has the issues? Mind you, I know we have them, and most of us are working on them. But it's not just us.  Men have issues too.  LOTS AND LOTS of issues.  So why are "we" the haters?  The bitter ones?  Can someone fill me in?  I guess reading this article bothered me so much because it's so one-sided and unfair.  I'm finding myself having to explain and/or defend not only my single status but my childless status as well.  People assume that if you're single, there must be something wrong with you or you're a loser, but if you're single AND childless, well then, you're just a freak and your life is basically over.  Oh and everyone will look at you with pity.    At least, that's how it is in my world.  I get so angry sometimes, at the population's ignorance on these matters.  As if being married and having children is the epitome of bliss.  Don't get me wrong, perhaps it is.  I don't know, because I've never done either. But if truth be told, the majority of my married friends, wish they were single again. And the majority of my friends who are parents, complain about being a parent.  So what gives? The grass is always greener and all that?

What do you think?

That being said, I recently reactivated my account on a dating site.  I dunno. I may take it down again. It's just that the more I play around with it, put in all the "right" pictures and words, the more it seems like work. And dating should not be this hard.  Meh,  we'll see.  If anything, at least the experience will give me more blog material. Because as you know, (if you're a regular around these parts) my dating experiences could be  a weekly sitcom.  I've even got a title, "The Misadventures of Yvonne's Dating Life" -eh, I'm still working on it. ;)

Oh yeah, on an unrelated note, my Houston Astros beat the Washington Nationals 11-4 tonight!  THREE triples in ONE inning!  Pure awesomeness!

Good night!

Sunday, April 15, 2012

me and my great ideas...

Dating.  We all know it sucks.  The whole going out, meeting someone, getting played or doing the playing.  You all know what I'm talking about right?  Of course you do.  Well, I think I've come up with a solution to this little "problem" of ours.  See, I was at a Crawfish Boil earlier today.  My friend Mary has one every year.  It's a lot fun! Friends (and sometimes foe) alike, get together and eat mudbugs.   That's what they call them. Don't look at me. I have not a clue.  I hate crawfish. It's gross.  But I'm in the minority.  Everyone raves about the "bugs".  I would never eat anything, I don't care how good it is, that is referred to as a "bug".  There were a few others of us there, the "bug haters", so Mary being the great hostess she is, provided other types of foods for us.

Back to my great idea.  There were children at this little gathering.  Well one of the kiddos  had a teddy bear.  He very proudly told me his mommy had bought it for him at Build a Bear.  It was the cutest thing! And that's when the light bulb in my head came on. (It happens from time to time)  You've all heard of the store called Build a Bear, yes?  No? Ok, Build a Bear is a store that has teddy bears, all kinds, all sizes and they're naked.  Really, they are. You  Children go in and pick a bear and literally build it.  Seriusly, they give you a birth certificate  and everything!  You get to pick out it's eyes, nose, mouth and then  pick out the clothing. (because ALL bears wear clothes, don't you know). They come with complete  accessories and make-up and shoes.  It sounds crazy, but it works.  The store is always full of kiddos and what parent is going to say no to a cute teddy?   I must admit, if I was a parent, I wouldn't say no.   I've  fallen prey to their cuteness and have been lured in on more than one occasion.  What? I have 6 nieces and nephews!

Oops!  My idea. Right. Sorry, I keep getting distracted. Or, I  forgot to take my ADD meds.  YOU decide.

Alright, why not have a Build A Date store? Complete with the guy/girl and all the necessary accessories! Think about it.  You go into a store, walk around, search for the "perfect" one, the one that catches your fancy, then dress them up to your liking and poof! Instant date.  How awesome would that be?  I know my plan still needs a lot of work.  But this rough draft is an excellent idea!  No more listening to incessant babbling, no more fighting off "Mr. Paws" at the end of a date, no more guessing games or games, period.  Nope. None of that.  It sounds awesome right?  Sigh, yeah, in a perfect world and all that.  It's a nice thought though.  My friends gave me a thumbs up, for effort. Then they took the bottle glass of wine away from me.

Good times, good times.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

"Yo Adrienne! I did it!"

In my best Rocky Balboa voice, but minus looking beat-up, bruised and bloodied, I am shouting that infamous line at the top of my lungs.  I did it! I made it through Lent and did not have an ounce of Coca-cola or caffeine AT ALL!!!  That's right, I'm a bad-ass.  For those of you who didn't get the Rocky movie reference or are wondering what the hell I'm talking about, let me explain.  I'm Catholic. The Lenten season began on February 22nd and on that day, I decided to give up drinking cokes and not having any type of caffeine whatsoever.  Today, Lent is officially over, as it is now 2:00 in the morning and Easter morning is dawning or will be dawning upon us soon.  "So what's the big deal?", you may be asking.  The big deal is that I am not a "follow-througher" at all.  I start things but never finish.  This is the first time in a billion years that I actually completed what I started. And let me tell you, it feels beyond awesome! Still shaking your head, wondering if I'm drunk or something?  No, not drunk.  Not tonight anyway. Kidding. I'm just so excited and proud of myself.  This goes deeper than just giving something up for Lent.  It means that I am capable of succeeding what I set out to do!  I've accomplished what I set out to do.  And that kids, is just fucking awesome!

Ok, I'm calming down now.  But I'm still grinning ear to ear.  Alright, Friday night when I posted about "the sighting", I was very emotional and not thinking clearly.  Today, I've had time to digest what happened and have let it go.  Just, let it go.  He is a part of my past.  He is someone I will always care  for deeply, but he is of no significance to my life.  I think seeing him, was therapeutic in a way.  It forced me to shut that door, that up to this point, I'd.always left ajar,  hoping.  Like I said Friday night, always look for the positive in a bad situation.  So that's that.

Why in God's holy name, am I still awake at this hour, I have not a clue!  I've got all this energy and can't fall asleep.  So I came here, and will probably watch something mind-numbing on the tele, until I pass out.  But in the meantime, who else is awake and what are you doing? And do you have any home remedies I can  try to fall asleep?  Here's what I got so far:

1.  warm milk -made me thirsty for water
2.  counting sheep -i counted ex boyfriends instead.  major fail since i'm still awake and now mad.
3.  exercising -worked out at midnight.  uh, yeah i'm still awake.
4.  sleeping pill -LIAR! am still awake
5.  calling my friend rene -can't do that anymore since we're no longer friends.  too bad, we would talk until       one of us fell asleep -usually me.
6.  sex- ok this one i did not try for obvious reasons.  ie-no man in my life

And there you have it -my ideas for falling asleep. Your turn...

While you think about it, I'm going to log off and go bang my head against the wall.  Or, something less dramatic and less painful, like watching a really boring movie. .

A beautiful and wonderful Easter Sunday to everyone!


Saturday, April 7, 2012

three days in april

hey bloggies! how are you? what's up in bloggie-land?  catch me up!  as for me?  well,  i've had a very busy and interesting past three days.  it all started on wednesday evening, when i went to a concert with my bff from elementary school.  we met in seventh grade and have been friends ever since.  we don't see each other often because she's married now, has children and lives on the other side of the world. (ok, it's only sugar land, which is not that far out of the city, but to me, it's the other side of the world)  anyway, we went to see mana -a spanish rock group.  we danced and sang the night away.  it was an awesome show and great night!  thursday morning, however, when i had to get up to go to work, it was not so great.  i was tired, sleepy and hoarse.  it seems i screamed a little bit too much the night before.  i somehow managed to make it through the day.  that evening, instead of going home to collapse on my bed like i wanted to, i rushed home, showered, got ready and headed back out the door.  you see, i had made plans with the usual suspects and a few other girlfriends to go salsa dancing that night. we figured since everyone was not working today, that it would be the best time to go.  -what? it seemed like a great idea at the time.  we just forgot about the part that we aren't 20 years old anymore.  nevertheless, we had a blasty blast!  some of us (who shall remain nameless) got hit on by guys who looked like they were all of eighteen years old.  and then others of us (again, nameless) got hit on by characters who could easily portray santa claus or father time.  seriously.  still, dancing the night away, was well worth it.  so this morning, again,  tired, still sleepy, feet throbbing (that's what happens when you wear super high heels -especially when you aren't used to wearing them!) but excited!  you see, today was opening day for baseball and the houston astros.  the usual suspects and i have a long-standing tradition. we've been going to opening day since 2004 or thereabouts.  it's pretty much a whole day kind of thing. we meet for lunch, somewhere near the ball park. then we walk over to the stadium and take in the day's festivities. there are bands performing and food vendors and games and tons of people out and about.  it's a mini street festival really.  there is electricity and excitement in the air.  and hope. always hope.  you know, new beginnings and all that.  with the worst record in franchise history last year, hope is about all we have guys!  while the game didn't end in our favor, the guys showed promise and hey, there's still 161 games left to redeem ourselves.

it was a very good day and good times were had by all.  well, with the exception of one small, minor (but not so minor) incident.  i had a "sighting" at the game.  by that i mean, i saw someone i used to know.  i ran into HIM.  for those new to my blog, there is one person that i have written about on numerous occasions in my blog.  i refer to him as HIM.  no name.  none needed.  he's someone that i fell hard for.  i was crazy about him.  i adored him.  he didn't have a clue. my feelings were not reciprocated. they were not mutual.  yet i allowed this person to use me. bleh.  anyway, i had not seen HIM in over two years.  and today, today of all days and as crowded as that stadium was, i saw HIM.  my friends and i walked into a bar, i didn't notice him right away.  but then i did.  i know he saw us walk in.  what i don't know is if he recognized me and thought, "oh shit!" and left, or if he even knew who i was. it was a span of a few minutes tops.  he was not alone.  i assume the girl he was with is his girlfriend or wife.  he could be married now, it's been so long.    when it dawned on me who it was, my heart started pounding, i couldn't breathe and the butterflies in my stomach returned.  so many emotions ran through me.  i wanted to go up and say hi, i wanted to run the other way.  i wanted very much to hug him, i wanted to slap him. hard. but none of that happened.  and that's a good thing.  i never "got" why this man, got under my skin like he did.  he was my addiction.  he is that one person, that can make me weak at the knees just by thinking about him.  he is that one person that will always make me blush.  sigh.  i was useless after that. in fact, my entire mood was shot.  i felt sad.  i felt very bad.  i just can't pinpoint why exactly.  a couple of years ago, i wrote a short, short, short story in male voice.  it was my first attempt to write this way.  well, he was the "voice". the story was about the way we met, but through his eyes.  while there is some fiction in there, the majority of it, is exactly as it happened when we met.  if you're so inclined, you can read it here:
so yeah, i've had not only a busy past few days, but also, a very emotionally draining day.  so much so that i'm about to call it a night.  oh!  positive? easter is one day away. which means, i'm one day closer to having a "coke and a smile!"

see? there's a positive in any circumstance. you just have to look hard for it.

thanks for indulging on my shenanigans.

be good!

Sunday, April 1, 2012

A dollar full of dreams and then some!

Well, it happened.  I didn't win the lotto. So, back to work I go tomorrow.  Heh.  Ok, so I didn't really think I had a chance in hell to win, but a girl can dream can't she?  I, along with the majority of others in this country, got caught up in the whole lotto fever thing.  My dad would be proud.  If you're new to this blog, you should know that my father is a devout lotto player.  He never misses. In fact, he's been in Nicaragua since January, but he made sure to call me the night before the lotto numbers were announced, to make sure I (a) bought my ticket and (b) picked the "right" numbers.  -That's my dad!  It's a nice dream, hitting the winning numbers.  I let myself get carried away with the hoopla and let my mind wander into the world of "what ifs"  As in, "What if I DID win?"  Here are a few things I came up with:

1.  I'd pay off all my debts
2.  I'd pay off all of my familys' debts
3.  I'd donate a fair share to my church
4.  I'd buy a house -the dream house I've always wanted
5.  I'd split it with my siblings.  Ensuring their futures and that of my nieces and nephews
6.  I'd make sure my parents would never want or long for anything the rest of their lives
7.  I'd travel the world
8.  I'd quit my job and devote my life to writing 
9.  I'd buy my dream car (duh!)
10. I'd buy world peace.  Kidding. Sort of.

Anyway, that's probably what I'd do, if I ever won the lotto or come into loads of money.  Hey, like I said, a girl's gotta dream, right?  

So I wanted to thank everyone for their comments and concern, the texts and the phone calls, that came to me shortly after I posted last week.  I was, still am actually, sorting through stuff that's going on with me, with my life.  Can't say I'm all better, but I'm not all bad.  Tomorrow is another day, and all that.  At any rate, thanks for the love guys! You sure know how to make a girl feel special.  And I love you all for it.

I've been trying to read up on all the blogs I've missed reading, so bear with me as I play catch-up.  Don't want you to think I'm ignoring you.

I have no idea why I am up so early this Sunday morning.  I normally like to sleep in. It's the only day that I can do that. But for some odd reason, I've been awake since about 5:30 a.m.  Not cool.  I gave up trying to fall back to sleep and came here instead.  

Day forty of no cokes.  That's right.  I said FORTY!  I'm down to the home stretch, got exactly 7 days left to go! I can't even believe it.  It's all so surreal.  I know some of you probably think I'm crazy for getting so excited about this.  But believe me when I say, that this is HUGE for me. Remember, I'm not a follow-through-er.  I never last this long.  And the fact that it's been forty days that I've stuck to my goal of not drinking any cokes/caffeine is incredibly amazing to me.  You have no idea how proud I am of myself.  

Alright, I'm going to see what kind of trouble I can get myself into on this beautiful day.  I hope you do the same!  Oh and hope you're not a fool today.  Tomorrow yes. But not today.  :)


Chapter 56

The sunlight peeping through the curtains, stir her from her sleep.  Her eyes open and she rubs them a bit before sitting up in bed.  Eyes n...