One of the ways I like to relax is by listening to music, sometimes with a glass of wine. Usually, I like to listen to Sade or Gypsy Kings or maybe some Cole Porter or Etta James. Tonight, I was listening to George Benson's "This Masquerade". So, as I sat there, siping on my wine and enjoying the music, I started thinking about the title. "Masquerade". Hmmm, it seems that most of my life I've lived in a masquerade of sorts at one time or another. Masking the truth, masking the pain, masking my reality. It was easier to pretend it wasn't there than to deal with it. -Whatever "it" was at the time. It's taken all these years to come full circle and to face all those "masks" that I wear and that make up my life. Some may read this and think that I've wasted so much time, and had I been enlightened by all of this early on, then maybe, just maybe, my life would be very different. -Maybe. But I don't see the experiences I've had to this point in time as failures or wasted time. It is because of everything that's happened to me that I am who I am today. At age 44, I have found myself. And I like her. I know I've got issues still to deal with (who doesn't?) and quite frankly, learning about myself scares the hell out of me sometimes! Fear of the unknown and all that! But that's what this "de-masking" is all about isn't it? Interesting how doing one of my favorite things leads me to peel off yet another layer of myself.
Cheers!
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7 comments:
When I think of Masquerade I think of Phantom of the Opera.
"Masquerade, paper faces on display, Masquerade, hide your face so the world will never find you."
http://theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com/
I LOVE Phantom!!!
progress at any age is still progress. Good 4 u.
It's never too late to learn, grow and change. I was an NLP seminar trainer and we had people in their 80's walking on fire and the whole nine yards. Keep peeling off those layers. Come out and play. We like you, too!
Sometimes the pain is hidden so well you don't even know yourself that you are wearing a mask - then something happens and your house of cards comes tumbling down. That happened to me when I was 45 and I was never the same again.
My daughter used to say, "Don't you wish it had never happened?" No, I don't. As painful as it can be to learn things about yourself, it is worse to be unaware and wondering what the hell is going on.
I don't know, do you get what I mean?
I was coming to comment on exactly what Adorkable said. Masquerade will always remind me of Phantom. And that is still quite fitting, no? :)
Good luck in all your de-masking.
Lorraine
Lorraine - Thanks for dropping by, please do come back! And Phantom is one of my favorites too!
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