When I was a little girl, my mom gave me a Walt Disney book. It contained numerous fairy tales and had vibrant, colorful pop-up pictures. My dad would read that book to my sister and I at bedtime while my mom brushed our hair or just laid in bed with us. My sister's favorite story was Cinderella. Mine was Snow White. Both had a common denominator: Prince Charming. I would be lying if I said that I did not get caught up in all the hoopla of today's Royal Wedding that took place across the pond. The fact that I've been up since 3:30 a.m. and it's now a little before 11:00 p.m. should tell you how much of a "fairy tale" lover I am. And I am. I remember watching Princess Diana marry Prince Charles. I was about 14 or 15 years old. I remember waking up at the wee hours of the morning and jumping into bed with my mom to watch the wedding. Just like today. We both wore our pajama finest! We were after all, watching regalia.
While watching the ceremony, my mom whispered to me in Spanish, "Ya llegara tu principe." Meaning, "Your prince will come." I just rolled my eyes in indifference. But that stuck with me all day. I kept thinking about the little girl that used to play dolls and always, always played "The Wedding" with Barbie and Ken. Even back then, I was hopeful. I just knew that I too, would have a "prince". But as the years go on and I am still here, alone, I can't help but wonder what happened to that little girl's dream? Don't misunderstand, I'm not jaded and certainly not cold. But I do think that I'm "indifferent" when it comes to hoping for "someone" to come into my life. I would like to think that I still believe in fairy tales, but the reality of it is, not so much. I do believe in love, and am a hopeful romantic, still. And I believe that my heart would compliment someone else's heart very well. But I don't dwell on it. As I get older, I realize that life is not for dreaming it away. Life is for living and hoping. We must never lose hope. And that's not to say I won't give someone (anyone at this point --kidding! I have to find the humor in this you know!) a chance. For now, that's all I can do. Live my life the best way I know how, and making myself happy. But today, today was all about fairy tales and princesses and princes and love and and outrageous hats! Good grief! Some of them were waay, waaay out there!
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take my tiara off and go to sleep.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Mr. Telephone Man
While talking with some friends over dinner last weekend, the topic of discussion soon turned to my dating life. Or rather, lack of dating life. Why my life and who I go out with or not go out with is so important to them is baffling to me! Surely there are other much more interesting and palatable topics to discuss! But no. Apparently, trying to get to the root of my dating angst is all the rage! So anyway, they asked me if I had ever picked up a random stranger.
"Uh like a one night stand? Duh!" Not that I did that all the time mind you. But hey, I never claimed to be a saint or a goody two shoes. Although I was called a prude once. But that's a different story for a different time. Let's move on.
"No not like a one night stand. Did you ever just blow someone's mind at first meeting and then went and got down and dirty somewhere?"
Ok, what part of one night stand did they not understand??? They had just described it!
"I think what *Gustabo is trying to say is have you ever met a guy and they melted at the sight of you or sound of you or because of your laugh or whatever!?"
Ugh! So much thinking called for more wine. While my friend *Lola poured the wine, I searched deep, deep, DEEP into my memory bank to see if I could recall anything even remotely interesting like that. And suddenly, the seas parted and there it was! The memory. *David V. Immediately I'm transported back to the year 2000. I'd just bought a condo and was still very much in the process of getting settled in. One morning, I'd told my mom to stay and "phone-sit" until the phone guy showed up to install everything. Well, I came home from work that evening and sure enough, the phone was working, the computer was working and all was well in my world. Or so I thought. Late that evening, I grabbed the phone and was about to dial out when I heard "voices" on the other end. Lots of "voices". Huh, that's weird. I hung up and then picked up again, and each time there were voices and sometimes hissing sounds. It scared the hell out of me! I remember grabbing my cell and calling the phone guy that had installed the thing. He had given my mom his business card and told her to call anytime if there was an emergency. Uh, weird noises seemed like the perfect emergency to me, don't you think?
He picked up on the second ring. "This is David."
"Hi, you're going to think this is a joke or I'm crazy but..." and I went on to describe what was going on. He laughed. That's right. Laughed in my ear. Not a chuckle. Not a slight giggle. A full-fledged, belly jumping laugh.
"You think this is funny?" I was now not only freaked out but indignant that he laughed at me.
"Yeah I do. Look, it's not that late, I can come by and check it out, if you want." This was not a time to be angry, I would give him a piece of my mind after he fixed whatever it is he needed to fix.
"Yes, come over now." And so he did. It turns out that the wires were crossed, that much I had already figured out, but what creeped me out was the hissing noises. He said that was probably my imagination. Really, he said that to me. He had audacity that's for sure! "Look, there aren't any gremlins in there. There's no more hissing of any kind. But if you hear it again, feel free to call me. Any time. Even if you don't hear it again. Feel free to call me."
Wait. What? Was he flirting with me??? He smiled and winked at me as he left. Yep. Flirting, definitely flirting. I went on with my life after that. About two days later, I get a phone call on my home phone. It was him. David. He wanted to know if I'd heard any more strange noises coming from my phone. Then he said "Not really. I was calling you because you've got the sexiest voice I've ever heard! And a smile to match it. I just wanted to tell you that."
"What'd you say? What'd you tell him?" my friends were now hanging on my every word. I took my time, poured myself another glass of wine and savored it as I drank it. "I thanked him, AFTER I picked myself up off the floor." You see bloggers, I'd fallen from the shock!
*David V. and I proceeded to go out on approximately two dates after that night. And then he confessed that he was engaged. End of story. I never saw him again.
My friends were silent. Tough thing to do for them. "It's okay guys. That was years ago. I'm fine." They felt bad for me so they ordered another bottle of wine and never asked me another question the rest of the night.
That little story got me thinking about other instances that my voice has played a part in piquing the male species' interest. None have resulted in me dating them. *David V. was the only one. But clients on the phone and strangers even, have complimented me on my voice. They say it's sexy. I say I sound like Mickey Mouse on Ritalin.
Bleh! Whatever. So bloggers, be good to the person on the other line. You never know when I might be calling! [Insert cheesy smile here]
"Uh like a one night stand? Duh!" Not that I did that all the time mind you. But hey, I never claimed to be a saint or a goody two shoes. Although I was called a prude once. But that's a different story for a different time. Let's move on.
"No not like a one night stand. Did you ever just blow someone's mind at first meeting and then went and got down and dirty somewhere?"
Ok, what part of one night stand did they not understand??? They had just described it!
"I think what *Gustabo is trying to say is have you ever met a guy and they melted at the sight of you or sound of you or because of your laugh or whatever!?"
Ugh! So much thinking called for more wine. While my friend *Lola poured the wine, I searched deep, deep, DEEP into my memory bank to see if I could recall anything even remotely interesting like that. And suddenly, the seas parted and there it was! The memory. *David V. Immediately I'm transported back to the year 2000. I'd just bought a condo and was still very much in the process of getting settled in. One morning, I'd told my mom to stay and "phone-sit" until the phone guy showed up to install everything. Well, I came home from work that evening and sure enough, the phone was working, the computer was working and all was well in my world. Or so I thought. Late that evening, I grabbed the phone and was about to dial out when I heard "voices" on the other end. Lots of "voices". Huh, that's weird. I hung up and then picked up again, and each time there were voices and sometimes hissing sounds. It scared the hell out of me! I remember grabbing my cell and calling the phone guy that had installed the thing. He had given my mom his business card and told her to call anytime if there was an emergency. Uh, weird noises seemed like the perfect emergency to me, don't you think?
He picked up on the second ring. "This is David."
"Hi, you're going to think this is a joke or I'm crazy but..." and I went on to describe what was going on. He laughed. That's right. Laughed in my ear. Not a chuckle. Not a slight giggle. A full-fledged, belly jumping laugh.
"You think this is funny?" I was now not only freaked out but indignant that he laughed at me.
"Yeah I do. Look, it's not that late, I can come by and check it out, if you want." This was not a time to be angry, I would give him a piece of my mind after he fixed whatever it is he needed to fix.
"Yes, come over now." And so he did. It turns out that the wires were crossed, that much I had already figured out, but what creeped me out was the hissing noises. He said that was probably my imagination. Really, he said that to me. He had audacity that's for sure! "Look, there aren't any gremlins in there. There's no more hissing of any kind. But if you hear it again, feel free to call me. Any time. Even if you don't hear it again. Feel free to call me."
Wait. What? Was he flirting with me??? He smiled and winked at me as he left. Yep. Flirting, definitely flirting. I went on with my life after that. About two days later, I get a phone call on my home phone. It was him. David. He wanted to know if I'd heard any more strange noises coming from my phone. Then he said "Not really. I was calling you because you've got the sexiest voice I've ever heard! And a smile to match it. I just wanted to tell you that."
"What'd you say? What'd you tell him?" my friends were now hanging on my every word. I took my time, poured myself another glass of wine and savored it as I drank it. "I thanked him, AFTER I picked myself up off the floor." You see bloggers, I'd fallen from the shock!
*David V. and I proceeded to go out on approximately two dates after that night. And then he confessed that he was engaged. End of story. I never saw him again.
My friends were silent. Tough thing to do for them. "It's okay guys. That was years ago. I'm fine." They felt bad for me so they ordered another bottle of wine and never asked me another question the rest of the night.
That little story got me thinking about other instances that my voice has played a part in piquing the male species' interest. None have resulted in me dating them. *David V. was the only one. But clients on the phone and strangers even, have complimented me on my voice. They say it's sexy. I say I sound like Mickey Mouse on Ritalin.
Bleh! Whatever. So bloggers, be good to the person on the other line. You never know when I might be calling! [Insert cheesy smile here]
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Just Like That...
You take hold of my entire being
I fall victim to your prey
What you have to offer is enticing
I have no self-control
I want to break free
I try and try
until I am spent
Fighting you no longer seems possible
So I give in.
And soon the darkness comes
The familiar
the tears
the fear
the anxiety
Sadness envelopes me
and you are pleased
Depression, my monster, has returned.
**I'm not having another "episode". I'm just feeling a little "blah" and this is one way I deal with my "blah-ness"**
I fall victim to your prey
What you have to offer is enticing
I have no self-control
I want to break free
I try and try
until I am spent
Fighting you no longer seems possible
So I give in.
And soon the darkness comes
The familiar
the tears
the fear
the anxiety
Sadness envelopes me
and you are pleased
Depression, my monster, has returned.
**I'm not having another "episode". I'm just feeling a little "blah" and this is one way I deal with my "blah-ness"**
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
The Waiting Game
A routine visit to the doctor, recently brought my mom an onslaught of follow-up visits, tests, different medications, treatments and a biopsy. The doctor found a mass on one of her breasts. Nothing like thinking you may or may not have cancer to put a halt to your normal life. Not to mention bring anxiety, worry and even despair to it. Not just by my mom, but my brothers and sister and I. The following days after the "find" everything was done in "ASAP" mode. Meaning, the doctors ordered everything "at once" and "immediately" All but the last part. The biopsy. Oh the procedure itself was quick and over in a mere minutes. It's the waiting that took forever. At least, to my mom, and me, and the rest of my family, it felt like forever. In reality it was about 12 days. Forever. Yesterday we heard the most beautiful words in the English language (ok, maybe a close second to "I love you" and "You are NOT the father!") come from my mom's doctor's mouth: "The test was benign. There is no cancer." To say that we were relieved would be an understatement. We were over-the-moon happy! I've never been so scared before. Not even when I had a gun pointed at me during a robbery. This was during high school, when I worked at a movie theater and it happened to get held up. Not even then, this by far, was scarier. My mom put on a brave front throughout the ordeal. She masked her angst and her worries. The "not knowing" kind of held all of us captive. And kept us that way until yesterday morning. After thanking God about a million times, I sighed a breath of relief. And our world was bright and sunny again.
I love my mother more than life itself. I don't know what I would do if anything ever happened to her. There are times when I can't stand her, when she gets on my nerves, when I'm angry with her, but make no mistake, this woman is amazing and deserving of all beautiful and wonderful things. And no matter if we argue one day and make up the next, our love is unconditional, honest and transcends any other bond there is in life. A mother's love is unique and stands alone. I was talking to my sister last night, we were discussing the days events and how happy we were about the results. She told me she had been really scared. And had cried herself to sleep almost every night since the "find". She said that "mom is the tape that holds our crazy family together." And she's right. She's our "tape" our "glue", our "miracle maker". We are so lucky to have this woman in our lives. If there is one thing I got from this ordeal it's that "Life is too short to waste." Indeed it is.
What will you do about it?
I love my mother more than life itself. I don't know what I would do if anything ever happened to her. There are times when I can't stand her, when she gets on my nerves, when I'm angry with her, but make no mistake, this woman is amazing and deserving of all beautiful and wonderful things. And no matter if we argue one day and make up the next, our love is unconditional, honest and transcends any other bond there is in life. A mother's love is unique and stands alone. I was talking to my sister last night, we were discussing the days events and how happy we were about the results. She told me she had been really scared. And had cried herself to sleep almost every night since the "find". She said that "mom is the tape that holds our crazy family together." And she's right. She's our "tape" our "glue", our "miracle maker". We are so lucky to have this woman in our lives. If there is one thing I got from this ordeal it's that "Life is too short to waste." Indeed it is.
What will you do about it?
Monday, April 25, 2011
Back At It
Hello kids! How is everyone? I hope your Easter (if you celebrate it) was a good one! I've been kind of quiet here in Blogland, the past few days. The main reason is the remodeling that's taking place at home. It's driving me insane! I had to seek "shelter" at my one of my brother's homes for the past four days. Thankfully, I get to go home tonight and sleep in my own bed, finally! So that, coupled with the holiday and family issues and "Yvonne" issues going on in my life, leaves little time to blog or to visit. I did manage to work on my novel though. That was HUGE progress for me! So I was productive in that respect. I have a lot of reading and commenting to catch up on here in the land of Blog. Give me time, I 'll get to you soon!
That's it for now guys. I've got to get back to work. I just wanted to touch base with everyone.
As always, make it a FABULOUS Monday! I know I will!
That's it for now guys. I've got to get back to work. I just wanted to touch base with everyone.
As always, make it a FABULOUS Monday! I know I will!
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Shopping for Men
No, no, you all must be thinking, "Oh! Yvonne found a store that sells men!" or, "That Yvonne! She's prowling perusing yet another dating site!" Sorry to disappoint kids, but that's not what I meant in the title. Nothing as exciting as that! The real story is that my boss's birthday is tomorrow. And I have to get him a gift. Well, I don't really have to, but I want to. I'm nice like that. At any rate, during my lunch break, I headed to the nearest department store and frantically searched for the "perfect" gift. What do you give a jerk? He's not always one, mind you. Just 97.5 percent of the time. Kidding. Maybe. What to buy? What to buy? I had not a clue! I just knew that I would know, as soon as I saw it! I walked up and down the aisles in the men's department. Soon enough, I found myself in the colognes section. Mmmmm! I love, love, love men to smell good! It's one of my weaknesses. I would be such an awesome girlfriend I tell you! Not only would my guy always smell great, but he'd look great too! I actually enjoy shopping for men. Sadly, I've not had one to shop for in a long time. Well except for *Gustabo. But he's my bestie, he doesn't really count. Although, for Christmas last year I got him a new scent that he'd never worn before and it was way sexy! He loved it! Actually, on my way home from the gym, I called to tell him about my shopping adventure. "Too bad we're not dating, they had the most amazing clothes at the store!" I told him excitedly. He laughed out loud and then said, "Yeah, I know, same here with the girlfriend thing. I'd have you so spoiled!" Sigh, alas, we're not a couple. "We could always pretend!" I told him. "Nah, that wouldn't work. We'd buy each other stuff but not be able to enjoy all the benefits that a boyfriend and girlfriend enjoy!" Dammit. He burst my bubble. "Way to kill my dream *Gustabo!" The rest of our conversation was complaining about our dating woes. So anyway, I ended up buying a tie for my boss. Yeah, yeah, I know, it's so "boring" and "predictable" But I honestly didn't know what to get him. You have to remember, this is the boss that makes cry sometimes and has me so stressed out I need alcohol on a regular basis! See, I don't really know him, know him. He's very private. And he's also only twenty-eight years old. (for a few more hours anyway) Which made it more difficult to decide what to get him. I figured that since he goes to court on a regular basis, I thought I'd get him a tie that screamed, "Success!". And I did. I'm glad because the ties he wears at times are b-uh-oring! Shh! Let's keep that to ourselves, shall we?
That was my Wednesday, how was yours?
That was my Wednesday, how was yours?
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Worst.Date.Ever. (Recycled)
Last night my good friend *Gustabo asked me if I had any "bad dates"
stories? Me? Muahahahaha! How much time you got? I asked him. So in
keeping with the "Bad Dates" theme and because I'm too tired to think of
anything even remotely interesting to write, I'm going "recycle" a post
I wrote back in October of 2010. For those that have read it already,
please indulge me again, and for those that have not read it yet, I hope
you enjoy it! Or laugh at it.
__________________________________________________
Earlier this evening I met up with a few friends for happy hour. Over wine and pizza (we improvised ok? nothing but the best for us!) the discussion of choice was "Worst/Best____ Ever!" So the group consisted of four women and six men. Clearly the ladies were outnumbered! One of the guys started the convo off by telling us how he had just been on the BEST date of his life and how he thinks she may be "the one" blah,blah,blah! So we all start trading our BEST date stories and then tried to one up each other. Well, they thinking they knew ALL of my secrets wouldn't let me get a word in edge wise! So I had to think fast and blurted out, "I was called a "cock block bitch" once!" Silence. Even our waitress stopped pouring the beer and just stared atus me. "Well I was!"
They were all staring at me in disbelief! "Ok fun-size, spill it!"
First, let me share with you, one of my many, many, MANY nicknames is
Fun-size. Stop laughing! I'm only 4'11 and ever since I can remember, I
have been given various nicknames because of this! Whatever. So I
proceed to tell them about my worst date ever. It happened years ago
mind you. During my Myspace phase. Lame. I know but it was all the rage
back then!!! And nothing has topped it -yet. Not even the "Bad Kisser" story! Don't believe me? Read for yourself...
We met by way of MySpace.com Separated by miles but bound by the internet. The emails began, the camaraderie, the bantering... All seemed well. All seemed okay. The "suitor" and I had a lot in common. We even grew up in the same neighborhood etc. He was a public school kid, I was a private school kid. Ironically, (or not) our paths never crossed while growing up. So the seeds of our "friendship" were planted and my insides became giddy at the possibility of something "new" transpiring. After countless emails and numerous, lengthy, phone calls, the "suitor" asked me out. We went out on a Friday. Now, I we debated going out at all that weekend. It happend to be Good Friday and while I'm not a hard-core, rosary carrying Catholic, I still feel odd going out and partying on Good Friday. Now Holy Saturday, well that's a whole different story! It's ON then! Ok where was I? Yeah so we decided to go ahead and keep it "calm" and just meet for dinner and drinks. And if things were going well, we'd go all out and take in a movie. I know, I know, I know how to party! When we finally met that Good Friday night, it was very nice. The entire evening was great! He winded and dined me. Literally. Heh. After dinner we decided to go listen to a jazz guitarist friend of mine. He was playing at a local establishment that we both frequented. Now at this point, I'm thinking, "ok, he hasn't even tried to hold my hand." Hmmm, he's going with the "gentleman" approach. Nice. There was a lot of talking and laughing and getting to know each other. Not in a Match.com kind of way but in a relaxed and totally spontaneous element. All indications led me to believe that this guy had more than potential! But wait. It got better. At then end of our date, my "suitor", ever the gentleman, decides he's going to walk me to my door (Yes this is how comfortable I felt about him, I let him pick me up at home). It was then that he reached for my hand. We walked slowly and comfortably to my door. Up to this point, this is the most we had done in terms of "intimate" contact! I thanked him for a nice time and kissed his cheek. He reaches for me and kisses me on the mouth. Totally caught me off guard! But it was nice. In my head, I tell myself that that is enough. He's coy. He's smooth. He goes for another one and I again, kiss him back. Finally, after some serious making out, we break away and I hug him and tell him to drive safe. He proceeds to ask me and I quote: "Can't you find somewhere better to put your hands?" (at the time, my hands were around his neck.) I looked at him incredulously, and he proceeded to take my hand and put it over his crotch! That's right ladies and gentleman! There was "lift" off!!! I pried my hand away quickly but not quickly enough not to feel his "arousal". At that moment I wanted to throw up. Not because I'm a prude, I'm not. But this idiot ruined an otherwise perfect evening and ruined any chance of building any type of relationship -platonic or otherwise with me. The night ended when he huffed away mad. But not before he telling me, "I thought you were an adult, you're just a cock block bitch." I'm totally serious! He actually said that to me! It was so silly I almost broke out in laughter but I was too angry at him! What happened to "dating"? You know, the guy picks up the girl at home, they go out, have a good time, walks her to the door and "maybe" they kiss or hug and then the date ends. This of course leading the way for the possibility of more dates more flirting, just more in the future! What happened to that? Am I so "backwards" that this does not happen anymore? I know I'm not because I have been on plenty of dates and none have ever, ever ended the way this one did!! Now, maybe you're thinking that I led him on or teased him. Did I lead him on? No. Did I flirt with him? Of course I did. I was attracted to him and I genuinely was starting to like him. Certainly, I would have wanted to get to know him better and see if it would lead to anything. At what point did our date turn into "You have to blow me?" Give me a break! I felt like I was back in high school fighting off a 9th grader with a hard on! Jeez! What a disappointment! Or in hindsight, a blessing in disguise? This is why dating is very "exclusive" for me and why I am so picky! Don't get me wrong, I am not giving up on dating because I refuse to believe all men are like this moron but damn! Talk about bursting a bubble... I should have known this was too good to be true...or rather, he was to good to be true...
Alas, that was a few days ago and it is past. My eyes are focused on the future and what wonderful, charming, sexy, intelligent men I have yet to meet...
____________________________________________________
"And THAT'S what happened." I said to my dorky friends.
"Bring her a shot!"
Lovely! My friends' answer to all of our plights, alcohol! Works for me, Salud!
__________________________________________________
Earlier this evening I met up with a few friends for happy hour. Over wine and pizza (we improvised ok? nothing but the best for us!) the discussion of choice was "Worst/Best____ Ever!" So the group consisted of four women and six men. Clearly the ladies were outnumbered! One of the guys started the convo off by telling us how he had just been on the BEST date of his life and how he thinks she may be "the one" blah,blah,blah! So we all start trading our BEST date stories and then tried to one up each other. Well, they thinking they knew ALL of my secrets wouldn't let me get a word in edge wise! So I had to think fast and blurted out, "I was called a "cock block bitch" once!" Silence. Even our waitress stopped pouring the beer and just stared at
We met by way of MySpace.com Separated by miles but bound by the internet. The emails began, the camaraderie, the bantering... All seemed well. All seemed okay. The "suitor" and I had a lot in common. We even grew up in the same neighborhood etc. He was a public school kid, I was a private school kid. Ironically, (or not) our paths never crossed while growing up. So the seeds of our "friendship" were planted and my insides became giddy at the possibility of something "new" transpiring. After countless emails and numerous, lengthy, phone calls, the "suitor" asked me out. We went out on a Friday. Now, I we debated going out at all that weekend. It happend to be Good Friday and while I'm not a hard-core, rosary carrying Catholic, I still feel odd going out and partying on Good Friday. Now Holy Saturday, well that's a whole different story! It's ON then! Ok where was I? Yeah so we decided to go ahead and keep it "calm" and just meet for dinner and drinks. And if things were going well, we'd go all out and take in a movie. I know, I know, I know how to party! When we finally met that Good Friday night, it was very nice. The entire evening was great! He winded and dined me. Literally. Heh. After dinner we decided to go listen to a jazz guitarist friend of mine. He was playing at a local establishment that we both frequented. Now at this point, I'm thinking, "ok, he hasn't even tried to hold my hand." Hmmm, he's going with the "gentleman" approach. Nice. There was a lot of talking and laughing and getting to know each other. Not in a Match.com kind of way but in a relaxed and totally spontaneous element. All indications led me to believe that this guy had more than potential! But wait. It got better. At then end of our date, my "suitor", ever the gentleman, decides he's going to walk me to my door (Yes this is how comfortable I felt about him, I let him pick me up at home). It was then that he reached for my hand. We walked slowly and comfortably to my door. Up to this point, this is the most we had done in terms of "intimate" contact! I thanked him for a nice time and kissed his cheek. He reaches for me and kisses me on the mouth. Totally caught me off guard! But it was nice. In my head, I tell myself that that is enough. He's coy. He's smooth. He goes for another one and I again, kiss him back. Finally, after some serious making out, we break away and I hug him and tell him to drive safe. He proceeds to ask me and I quote: "Can't you find somewhere better to put your hands?" (at the time, my hands were around his neck.) I looked at him incredulously, and he proceeded to take my hand and put it over his crotch! That's right ladies and gentleman! There was "lift" off!!! I pried my hand away quickly but not quickly enough not to feel his "arousal". At that moment I wanted to throw up. Not because I'm a prude, I'm not. But this idiot ruined an otherwise perfect evening and ruined any chance of building any type of relationship -platonic or otherwise with me. The night ended when he huffed away mad. But not before he telling me, "I thought you were an adult, you're just a cock block bitch." I'm totally serious! He actually said that to me! It was so silly I almost broke out in laughter but I was too angry at him! What happened to "dating"? You know, the guy picks up the girl at home, they go out, have a good time, walks her to the door and "maybe" they kiss or hug and then the date ends. This of course leading the way for the possibility of more dates more flirting, just more in the future! What happened to that? Am I so "backwards" that this does not happen anymore? I know I'm not because I have been on plenty of dates and none have ever, ever ended the way this one did!! Now, maybe you're thinking that I led him on or teased him. Did I lead him on? No. Did I flirt with him? Of course I did. I was attracted to him and I genuinely was starting to like him. Certainly, I would have wanted to get to know him better and see if it would lead to anything. At what point did our date turn into "You have to blow me?" Give me a break! I felt like I was back in high school fighting off a 9th grader with a hard on! Jeez! What a disappointment! Or in hindsight, a blessing in disguise? This is why dating is very "exclusive" for me and why I am so picky! Don't get me wrong, I am not giving up on dating because I refuse to believe all men are like this moron but damn! Talk about bursting a bubble... I should have known this was too good to be true...or rather, he was to good to be true...
Alas, that was a few days ago and it is past. My eyes are focused on the future and what wonderful, charming, sexy, intelligent men I have yet to meet...
____________________________________________________
"And THAT'S what happened." I said to my dorky friends.
"Bring her a shot!"
Lovely! My friends' answer to all of our plights, alcohol! Works for me, Salud!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)