Tuesday, April 26, 2011

The Waiting Game

 A routine visit to the doctor, recently brought my mom an onslaught of  follow-up visits, tests, different medications, treatments and a biopsy.  The doctor found a mass on one of her breasts.  Nothing like thinking you may or may not have cancer to put a halt to your normal life.  Not to mention bring anxiety, worry and even despair to it.  Not just by my mom, but my brothers and sister and I.  The following days after the "find" everything was done in "ASAP" mode. Meaning, the doctors ordered everything "at once" and "immediately"  All but the last part.  The biopsy.  Oh the procedure itself was quick and over in a mere minutes.  It's the waiting that took forever.  At least, to my mom, and me, and the rest of my family, it felt like forever.  In reality it was about 12 days.  Forever.  Yesterday we heard the most beautiful words in the English language (ok, maybe a close second to "I love you" and "You are NOT the father!") come from my mom's doctor's mouth:  "The test was benign.  There is no cancer."  To say that we were relieved would be an understatement.  We were over-the-moon happy!  I've never been so scared before. Not even when I had a gun pointed at me during a robbery.  This was during high school, when I worked at a movie theater and it happened to get held up.  Not even then, this by far, was scarier.  My mom put on a brave front throughout the ordeal.  She masked her angst and her worries.  The "not knowing" kind of held all of us captive.  And kept us that way until yesterday morning.  After thanking God about a million times, I sighed a breath of relief. And our world was bright and sunny again. 

I love my mother more than life itself.  I don't know what I would do if anything ever happened to her.  There are times when I can't stand her, when she gets on my nerves, when I'm angry with her, but make no mistake, this woman is amazing and deserving of all beautiful and wonderful things.  And no matter if we argue one day and make up the next, our love is unconditional, honest and transcends any other bond there is in life.  A mother's love is unique and stands alone.  I was talking to my sister last night, we were discussing the days events and how happy we were about the results.  She told me she had been really scared.  And had cried herself to sleep almost every night since the "find".  She said that "mom is the tape that holds our crazy family together."  And she's right.  She's our "tape" our "glue",  our "miracle maker".  We are so lucky to have this woman in our lives.  If there is one thing I got from this ordeal it's that  "Life is too short to waste."  Indeed it is. 

What will you do about it?


David Batista said...

That *is* scary. I could only imagine. Thank god everything turned out to be a false alarm. Phew!

Life is short. Even if you live to 100, it's still too short. So it's important to not get hung up on the stupid little things . . . don't let grudges get the better of you, or go on for too long. Love life and appreciate it. That's what's important.

It is to me.

S said...

Wow- this post really hits home. You'd think by now they'd be able to get results faster than 12 days. What a terrible, anxious time. I am so glad it turned out well. Must be a major relief.

Thank you for reminding me of the preciousness of life - and family. I can't wait to see my mom this weekend. I will hug her harder than usual!

Krissy said...

We've had cancer in my family, so I can understand the extreme relief you all felt. I'm so happy for your family! Life is definitely too short, and I've tried to savor so much of it with my parents because I know we are lucky to have had them as long as we have. :)

Robin said...

Living on the other side of this coin, I am so happy for you. Time is something that you just don't get back. So glad that you got a chance to see it for what it is before it was too late. Cherish it. Spend it. Live with no regrets. When the day comes that she passes, know that you did everything that you wanted to with her while she was here. ((Hugs))

'Yellow Rose' Jasmine said...

Indeed, this sentiment of how much it means in that moment when you realize just how short life is... this is exactly what changed my whole life. And why my life direction is moving in the 'you don't have forever to do this thing called life, so do it now!' direction.
So happy for you, your family and your Mom!

Yvonne said...

David - Thank you! Yep, life is short, so we must all make the best of it, while we can.

S- Awww, I'm sure your mom will appreciate that! Yeah, I'm not sure why it took so long but it did. The waiting was excrutiating for us. Thank you for your kind words!

Robin - Aww Robin, I know you're having a difficult time. I wish you nothing but the best! Stay strong!

YRJ- Thank you!!!

Random Girl said...

What a touching tribute to your mom. I hope she reads this because if you tell her a thousand times, hearing it again can't hurt right? Glad you got good news!

Yvonne said...

RG- Thank you! I don't let her read what I write all the time, but this I did show her. She cried. I cried. It was a very sappy moment. Almost Hallmark worthy! :)

The Frisky Virgin said...

I'm crying. My mama means the world to me, so I know exactly how you feel and how utterly terrified you must have been.

Life is so very short. Maybe it's time to make the "impossible" dreams come true.

Anonymous said...

Hooray that it's benign!