Monday, September 28, 2020

Anticipation -no not like the song

 When it comes to birthdays, I'm a kid.  A big kid.  I love birthdays.  I love parties and having people over or going out to celebrate. I love cake and flowers and presents.  Especially the presents.  I love being spoiled -even if I am the one doing the spoiling.  I'm totally worth it.  I just love it.  I don't really pay much attention to the number.  Ha, yeah right.  I'm lying.  Of COURSE I pay attention to the number.  But truth be told? I try not to dwell on how many years I have been alive but rather on how much more living I have to do.  There is so much traveling I have not yet done and goals I have not yet accomplished.  I mean, I haven't even met the man of my dreams yet.  Get serious.  This year was the year that I was supposed to check off alot of items on my Bucket List.  But then the pandemic came to visit and that witch still has not left.  

This year obviously, the celebrating will be much different than birthdays past.   I have the privilege of sharing my birthday with my mom.  I was her birthday present 53 years ago (almost 54).  She is turning 75 this year and my family and I had planned to have a party to beat all parties but alas, we all know what happened to those plans.  So now, our celebration will be much smaller and limited to just us (my siblings, their spouses and the grandkids) with masks in tow all while practicing social distancing -of course.  Our birthday is not until Saturday but we are planning to celebrate all weekend.  We still managed to plan a few surprises so, eff you Covid.

My mom asked me the other day what I wanted for my birthday this year and honestly, I just shrugged my shoulders.  Not because I don't have a long list of things that I would love, but because we have all been through and continue to go through the most suckiest year of our lives, that asking for material, irrelevant things just seems so, so wrong.  Instead I decided I wanted to remain in a state of gratefulness.  Grateful for God's grace and mercy.  Grateful that my mom is still here with us, especially after her stroke last year.  Grateful for the people in my life, past and present.  Grateful for what is to be in my life.  I'm happy.  I mean, no I don't have everything that I would like in my life, no it's not always a good day but it's not always a bad day either, in spite of what our world is going through.  Things can always be worse.  Life changes in an instant.  If you didn't believe it before, I know you believe it now.  So as my mom and I get ready for our next trip around the sun, I hope all of you are doing well and staying healthy and just living life the best you can.  Send me and mom good wishes on Saturday from wherever you are in the world, we would love and appreciate it so much.

-peace 

Chapter 56

The sunlight peeping through the curtains, stir her from her sleep.  Her eyes open and she rubs them a bit before sitting up in bed.  Eyes n...