Thursday, May 2, 2019

just words

Ending a relationship with someone, whether it be a romantic one or a platonic one, is never easy.  Especially if time and emotion are invested.  As much as I pride myself in being strong, tonight I am anything but that.  Instead I am fragile.  Emotionally spent.  Needy.  Having a pity party for one.  Yay me.   Isn't it interesting that even though I know that I made the best decision by ending a relationship that I had invested 5 years of my life to, even still, I feel bad.  Like the minute after I ended it, I regretted it and wanted to take my words back.  Of course I didn't.  Because I know that as excruciatingly painful as it was for me to do, it was for the best.  Breaking up with someone just sucks.  Sometimes I hate being an adult and making adult decisions.  But hey, my conscience is clear and my mind is relieved, so there's that.  Still, it.sucks.alot.

Here's to a new month and change.  Cheers.

Wednesday, May 1, 2019

a little broken

my heart aches
i feel sick to my stomach
pangs of regret
flashing thoughts of
"what if I made the wrong decision?" torment me
but through the tears
the pain 
my doubts,
my heart, broken as it is,
knows this was right
letting go