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Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Shopping for Men

No, no, you all must be thinking, "Oh! Yvonne found a store that sells men!" or, "That Yvonne! She's prowling perusing yet another dating site!"  Sorry to disappoint kids, but that's not what I meant in the title.  Nothing as exciting as that!  The real story is that my boss's birthday is tomorrow.  And I have to get him a gift.  Well, I don't really have to, but I want to.  I'm nice like that.  At any rate, during my lunch break, I headed to the nearest department store and frantically searched for the "perfect" gift.  What do you give a jerk?  He's not always one, mind you.  Just 97.5 percent of the time.  Kidding.  Maybe.  What to buy? What to buy? I had not a clue!  I just knew that I would know, as soon as I saw it!  I walked up and down the aisles in the men's department.  Soon enough, I found myself in the colognes section.  Mmmmm! I love, love, love men to smell good! It's one of my weaknesses.  I would be such an awesome girlfriend I tell you! Not only would my guy always smell great, but he'd look great too!  I actually enjoy shopping for men.  Sadly, I've not had one to shop for in a long time.  Well except for *Gustabo.  But he's my bestie, he doesn't really count.  Although, for Christmas last year I got him a new scent that he'd never worn before and it was way sexy! He loved it!  Actually, on my way home from the gym, I called to tell him about my shopping adventure.  "Too bad we're not dating, they had the most amazing clothes at the store!"  I told him excitedly.  He laughed out loud and then said, "Yeah, I know, same here with the girlfriend thing. I'd have you so spoiled!" Sigh, alas, we're not a couple.  "We could always pretend!" I told him. "Nah, that wouldn't work.  We'd buy each other stuff but not be able to enjoy all the benefits that a boyfriend and girlfriend enjoy!"  Dammit. He burst my bubble.  "Way to kill my dream *Gustabo!"  The rest of our conversation was complaining about our dating woes.  So anyway, I ended up buying a tie for my boss.  Yeah, yeah, I know, it's so "boring" and "predictable" But I honestly didn't know what to get him. You have to remember, this is the boss that makes cry sometimes and has me so stressed out I need alcohol on a regular basis! See, I don't really know him, know him.  He's very private.  And he's also only twenty-eight years old. (for a few more hours anyway)  Which made it more difficult to decide what to get him.  I figured that since he goes to court on a regular basis, I thought I'd get him a tie that screamed, "Success!".  And I did.  I'm glad because the ties he wears at times are b-uh-oring! Shh! Let's keep that to ourselves, shall we?

That was my Wednesday, how was yours?

11 comments:

Shady Del Knight said...

Our mutual friend Israel is currently my guest blogger, Yvonne. I thought you might want to show your support by coming over and learning a little more about his life and music. Thank you!

David Batista said...

I hate to admit it, but my wife is a terrible shopper for men (i.e., ME!). I buy 98% of all my own clothing, which I absolutely HATE doing but somebody has to. If I left it up to her I'd have to join a nudist colony.

Oilfield Trash said...

Men are easy to shop for if you know them really well. If not then I can see how it would be a problem.

Moby said...

I love it when my fiance shops for me! I hate the mall so bad.. Even more so the smells at the mall. I hate all the stinky people and perfumes and deoderants and gross greasy food... YUCK!

Plus she has way better style than me :)

You should read about Mobys Latest Purchase if you have some free time. I am a very dedicated follower! :)

Cinderita said...

Oh my GOD! I totally thought you were finding men on a dating site!! HA! Goes to show where my mind immediately goes!

Sandra said...

You're right! I totally thought you were out prowling for men!!! Good title!
So I've come to read you, but also to say: get working on that novel! I so can't wait for the day I buy a "signed" copy from you!!! So go write. Now! Go! Stop reading! Go now! I see you, you haven't left yet! :)

The Frisky Virgin said...

Sounds like you did really well. You really can't go wrong with a tie for a guy who wears ties. :)

Sounds way better than eating a rotten nut. :/

Rob Slaven said...

Hrm. I'll be interested to hear how this whole 'buying your male boss a gift' thing goes over. Perhaps I'm an old fogie, but part of me feels like this could be a bit awkward. Hopefully he doesn't show up the next day with flowers for you. ;)

Guys who are jerks 97.5% of the time can get the wrong idea in a heck of a hurry. :)

Good luck!

Jennifer Brown Banks said...

Yvonne,

I'm always greatly entertained and engaged whenever I stop by. Thanks for sharing. And congrats on the growing followers!

Yvonne said...

Shady - thanks for the heads up!

David - really? haha! i'm wondering how much better you fare at it than your wife! :)

OT- Yes, super easy when it's someone I know!

Moby - thanks for your comments! I will check out your blog as well! You're lucky that your wife has better taste and shops for you!

Rita - I knew it! :)

Sandra- yay! I like when you come visit! Girl, I'm tryin! I wrote two chapters this weekend. That's huge for me!

FV- yes, definitely way better than eating a bad nut! ;)

Rob- Thanks for the follow! Welcome to my chaos! As for the gift, nah, he knows it was an employee giving an employer a gift as a good gesture. But I agree with you, guys are jerks! :)

Jennifer- I'm always humbled when you drop by and comment! Glad I entertain you! lol And thanks!!! I'm excited about that myself! :)

The Adorkable Ditz said...

I need to get a job so I can spoil my boyfriend. On occasion I get him food and money to repay stuff he gets me like awesome stuffed animals and a few shirts and such, but I do agree when you like a nice smelling man.

Shhh don't tell Cam this but I think he smells wonderful even without cologne/body spray, but there is this one brand Bod that has this really ripped abs and surprisingly it smells really good...When he's not jokingly spraying it all over me! HAHA

http://theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com/