I read an interesting article in last Sunday's paper. Yes I am one of the few remaining lovers of the almost extinct "Sunday Paper" (*gasp*) So the article I read was about men and women and friendship. Basically, the writer claimed that men and women could not possibly be friends and lovers or friends AFTER they are no longer lovers. Why? Well, the writer cited emotions from either the man or the woman and unrequited love. I mulled this over for a bit. The majority of my friends are women, however, I have had two best friends who are men and neither were my lovers. Well, okay, let me retract! See what had happened was---- Ok, my first "bestie" who is of the male species, we'll call him *Gustabo. Well, *Gustavo and I became the best of friends. We had an immediate "connection" and our friendship grew over a period of time. BUT, I did the dumbest thing. I fell in love with him. Hook, line and sinker! I debated for a long time whether or not to let him know how I felt, because I didn't want to lose the relationship we had, in the end, I told him. Like the great guy that he was, he told me he did not feel the same way -in the most gentle way possible of course! Well, I thought I could handle being just his friend. But I couldn't. Listening to his woes of love and stories of women he dated were torture for me. We slowly started putting distance between us and soon, we became acquaintances who smile and exchange pleasantries when we see each other, but aside from that, the bond we once had, was gone. I miss him, but I know letting him go was the best thing I could have ever done -for me.
My next bestie, we'll also call him *Gustabo --- hey I'm tired, and it's late. My relationship with *Gustabo the 2nd is one of the most honest and sincere relationships I have in my life! He truly is my best friend and there is nothing either of us wouldn't do for each other. And we're strictly platonic. There is no underlying pulse of "attraction" to one another and that's a great thing. We've seen each other naked -metaphorically speaking I mean. It's a great feeling to know that someone's got your back, no matter what! Now, before I get comments or the dreaded emails/texts from my GIRL friends, calm down, I know you are all the best! And you will have my back ALWAYS, and I love you for that, but I'm not talking about YOU tonight, so put the cell phones down and keep reading my blog!
Reading that article brought back a lot of memories for me. And it was nice revisiting that part of my life for a while. Not sure I totally agree with the writer though. I mean, I know people who were lovers first and then became friends, or friends first and then became lovers, and now have the best of both worlds. So, maybe it's just the luck of the draw? Maybe it's fate? I'm not sure what it is really. I just know that if you're lucky enough to have someone in your life who is your best friend as well as your lover, you've won the lottery!
Hmm, perhaps I should go buy a ticket!