bare

look at me
not past me
see me for who i am
not who you think i am

look at me
the real me
standing naked, exposing her soul

you don't get it
i try and explain
over and over
but you don't get it

full circle
life goes on
and so will i

again.

sometimes i feel as if the people in my life have no idea what is really going on in my life.  oh they know about the obvious things.   but not what's inside, deep, deep inside, sometimes hidden so well, that i forget that part of me exists.  but then it surfaces, and i remember that i'm flawed.  jaded.  scared.  lonely and very sad.

or maybe they do know or realize it, but don't know what to say to me.  the thing is, i don't even know what to say to me sometimes.  instead, when i feel this way, i lose myself in my words, in my stories, in anything that will make the ache i feel inside, go away or at best, dull itself into oblivion.

maybe rambling way past my bedtime isn't the smartest thing to do, but for now, for me, it's the best thing.