Friday, March 8, 2013

midnight ramblings

a little after the bewitching hour and i'm still awake.
wide.awake.
tomorrow morning is going to suck.

who else is up at this hour in blog land?

just me?  figures.

thanks for the words of encouragement and emails i received in response to my last post.  i appreciate all of you very much.  i'm doing better.  much better.  not great. just better.  i have good days and bad days.  today was a good day.  that's how i'm living my life these days.  one at a time.

it's rodeo time here in houston.  for those not in the know, the rodeo comes to town once a year.  for two and half weeks, our fair city reverts back to cowboy boots, huge belt buckles, horses, parades and plenty of bar-b-q -because every old western movie had a good bbq meal in it.  --yes i'm being sarcastic.  actually, this time of the year is a fun time.  if you're into the whole country western, ho-down scene.  surprisingly (again with the sarcasm) i am not.  i don't like country music.  i don't do rodeo stuff, unless you count staring at the hot cowboys in their tight wranglers, well then i'm all over that.  but eh, not a fan of the rodeo.  all of my friends are though.  i have some hardcore ladies and gents who live for this time of year.  seriously.  some volunteer to work the carnival, the livestock show, the concerts, -whatever it is, as long as they are a part of it somehow.  i can't wait until it's over.  the traffic is annoying.  more than usual.

i started working on a new short story.  i'm excited about it.  that's a very good thing.  i haven't been excited about much of anything lately.  so this makes me happy.  i've also thrown myself back into the gym.  i'm getting results, slowly, but i'm getting results.  another happy!

recently i parted ways with someone that in a very short time span, became a very good friend.  however, for reasons i still don't understand, we've parted ways.  that disappointed me and added to my sadness. but i accept it.  life is like a revolving door.  people come in and out of your life constantly.  i believe she served her purpose in my life and has moved on to continue her journey.  -eh, it works for me, to think this way.

i'm super excited about my relationship with my guy friend.  you know the one, we were best friends for many years and then had a falling out in mid 2010?  remember?  then we made up this past december,  after not speaking for two years.  remember now? yeah, him.  well, it's been a long road, but we're slowly mending our relationship and rebuilding that bridge of trust.  i love him to pieces and i know he loves me back just the same. this time around, we are more careful and more in tune with each others emotions and feelings.  it's a beautiful thing, really.  a beautiful thing.

oh here's something that's been bugging me.  what is it with friends who want to set you up the second after you break up with someone???  i mean, thanks for the gesture but can i dry my tears first???  i just don't get it.  and then, when you politely tell them that, "no i'm not interested, right now"  they get all upset!  why???

random thoughts on friday eve.  well now it's officially friday, so never mind.

yeah i know, i'm babbling.  i guess sleep has come a callin for me.

do me a favor, do something fun this weekend! then come back and tell me all about it!

be  good.

6 comments:

not displayed said...

Hope you managed to get some sleep.
Not fun when the brain wont switch off.
Not sure I would be much of a fan of Rodeo either, although a cute cowboy is always worth a look

Sending hugs

Belle said...

It is great you are back to writing and working out. I would guess your friends want you to start dating again so you will be happy. But, a person has to grieve a loss. It takes time.

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Robin said...

I don't know why some people want to set you up immediately after a break up. I think that it is what THEY would want. People tend to do for others as they would want for themselves. Does that help?

I am glad one of your friendships is going well.

We do have friends who come and go. That is the way of things. The good news is that you probably have a new girlfriend on the way in!

Unknown said...

That's a good question, and I think it stems from our basic instinct to fix things. I know how you feel though. It's kind of like someone suggesting you get a new puppy when you tell them your dog died. I don't think it's ill intentioned, but it's hurtful in the sense that it's dismissive. Like the relationship was meaningless.

Yvonne said...

Mynx- Sleep finally came, but my alarm clock came much faster! Yeah, the highlight of rodeo time for me, is always the boys in wranglers. :)

Belle- Yes, I know they mean well and I love them for it. Everyone grieves differently. Some people jump right back into their lives and then others, like myself, want to be sad and dwell in it for a bit. I'll be fine, like you said, it will take some time. :)

Robin- Thanks so much and yes, you made perfect sense to me.

Felicia- Yes that's exactly it! But I also understand that they mean well, it's just so hard to take in all at once, you know?

Chapter 56

The sunlight peeping through the curtains, stir her from her sleep.  Her eyes open and she rubs them a bit before sitting up in bed.  Eyes n...