just words

Ending a relationship with someone, whether it be a romantic one or a platonic one, is never easy.  Especially if time and emotion are invested.  As much as I pride myself in being strong, tonight I am anything but that.  Instead I am fragile.  Emotionally spent.  Needy.  Having a pity party for one.  Yay me.   Isn't it interesting that even though I know that I made the best decision by ending a relationship that I had invested 5 years of my life to, even still, I feel bad.  Like the minute after I ended it, I regretted it and wanted to take my words back.  Of course I didn't.  Because I know that as excruciatingly painful as it was for me to do, it was for the best.  Breaking up with someone just sucks.  Sometimes I hate being an adult and making adult decisions.  But hey, my conscience is clear and my mind is relieved, so there's that.  Still, it.sucks.alot.

Here's to a new month and change.  Cheers.

a little broken

my heart aches

i feel sick to my stomach

pangs of regret

flashing thoughts of

"what if I made the wrong decision?" torment me

but through the tears

the pain 

my doubts,

my heart, broken as it is,

knows this was right

letting go