Sunday, March 20, 2011

Teeter Tottering of Life

It's all about balance. That's the conclusion I've come to in my quest to create a "better version of myself" What I mean by that is, all of this time I've been juggling everything all at once.  Trying to do it all and not stopping to concentrate on the areas of my life that needed the most concentrating.  No, instead I focused on the whole picture, trying to do it all.  In the process, I lost myself again.  I became too involved in trying to "fix" everyone and everything else.  This behavior is cyclical with me.  It's a problem. I need to stay focused and strive for improvement on me, and nothing or no one else.  And as harsh or selfish as that sounds, it is what it is.  If I don't do this, who will?  Nobody that's who.  And whoever got ahead being a "nobody"?  What I've learned thus far, is that the problems, the worries, the anxieties, the D-rama, is all going to be there whenever I finally get to it.  The world won't fall apart (not any more than it's already falling apart) and life will go on.  My family, my friends, they will be fine.  I have got to learn to practice what I preach.  I believe everyone is capable of balance. Whether it be of your life or your job or your relationships, whatever it is, everyone is capable.  Even me.  My goal now is to learn how to find that in my life. Balance. Hmm, considering I fell off the pommel horse FIVE times in high school while in gym class, and considering that I am always losing my balance, even when I'm totally sober, this new idea of mine is not going to be easy! Is it doable? I totally believe that it is.  Will I stick to it? I'm going to give my best shot.  That's all I can do.  I find it ironic that I was born in October, thus making me a Libra.  You know, the whole scales thing?   And here I am now, trying to find balance.  Coinky dink? I think not! 

In other news, today was a great day! My dad came back from his self-imposed sabbatical to Nicaragua.  We saw him yesterday.  He marveled us with his many stories and escapades from his motherland.  He looks good, well rested and happy to be home.  That was yesterday, today, my siblings (sans one) and their kiddos all came over in the afternoon.  We hung out and spent much needed "family" time with each other.  I have a four month old nephew that I have fallen in love with.  He is so cute! And he's all chubby-kins and rolly poly! I held him hostage in my arms, most of the afternoon.  So tonight, I got a phone call from my sister, she informed me that Ethan (my five year old nephew) was not too happy with me. When I asked her why, she said that he didn't like that I held "Zachary" so long.  He wanted to know why I didn't hold him like that??? HA!  Cute, my nephews are biding for my attention and one of them isn't even old enough to realize it.

Ok kids, it's that time again.  Sunday is quickly disappearing and I see Monday on the horizon.  Make it a great one!

7 comments:

David Batista said...

Yes, balance is the key to life. Some people think trying to do everything at once is balance . . . but you obviously know this is not so.

And good for you on wanting to focus on yourself. You're right -- only you can take care of you!

Krissy said...

It is awfully ironic that is your sign, but I kinda got the impression you've been needing to point this balancing thing out to yourself for a while. I need to do the same, but there are a lot of things in my life that need my attention for now. Once school is over, it will be so much easier to juggle and prioritize.

That nephew love thing is irreplaceable for me! :)

Belle said...

I found balance in my life when I began to say No to people. I need a calmness around me and I have found that. When someone asks me to do something now, I think about it first and if I know I'll get frazzled I tell them I can't do it.

I love having new babies in the family. We haven't had one in a long time, but I can wait! That would make me a great-grandma!

Jennifer Brown Banks said...

Entertaining as always. Thanks for sharing!

Anonymous said...

I need Libras in my life. My mom is one and so is Cam Man and even though I'm a Virgo and am persnickety about a shit ton of stuff my balance meter is off. Haha.

Yvonne said...

David - You are wise beyond your years grasshopper! ;)

Krissy - Yep! I'm a "work in progress" kinda gal! Oh and my nieces and nephews are my heart! :)

Belle - That's exactly it! I'm a "yes" girl, fervently practicing to say "no" more often!

Jennifer - Thank you!

Ditzy- Persnikety! I have not heard that word before!!! Cool!!! :) Oh and I knew I liked Cam for a reason!

Yvonne said...

Belle- You're going to make a fabulous great-grandma one day!

Chapter 56

The sunlight peeping through the curtains, stir her from her sleep.  Her eyes open and she rubs them a bit before sitting up in bed.  Eyes n...